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  I'm a:

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  Me, looking at next week's temperatures like a dog looks at a steak:

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  Make sure to take your robot vacuum out for a walk sometimes, so it can try dirt from different places.

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  My husband is very ticklish, and I do take advantage of this, occasionally. I know he is just trying to protect his midsection from evisceration, but I haven't eviscerated someone in forever.

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  I hate that I perceive time linearly, and I can't even pronounce linearly very well. That makes me remember something that happened a few years ago...WAIT A MINUTE

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  I was today years old when I realized Jason Lee, the Skateboarder, and Jason Lee, the Actor were the same person.

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  Our Bathroom Spiders won't even let me pet them.

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  Existence means holding duality. The Universe is beautiful, and full of suffering. Sometimes I feel like I can't hold it all inside me.

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  Okay, I thought I'd share a nice Dad story to even things out a bit. I was probably 7 years old, and had already been asleep for awhile. My Dad came, and woke us up, and we thought it was morning, but he told us to put on our winter clothes, and come outside. It had snowed quite a bit after we went to bed, so there was a pretty deep layer of snow glistening under the moon. My Dad pulled us around on sleds, and built snowmen with us, until our fingers were numb, and my Mom insisted we come...

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  Old school Dad stories are like, my Dad loved horses, and one day he stopped riding horses for eight years, and threw something in the old well, and covered it with concrete, and never talked about it again.

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  I remember when I was a kid, my aunt gave me all the Little House on the Prairie books. I read them, and remember thinking how awful it was, and didn't get why people were inspired to homestead because of it. Of course, when I got older, I found out the books were heavily edited by her daughter Rose, and it was much worse than even the books portrayed, and Pa was a hot mess.

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  Sitting through this heat wave, that's basically lasted through the entire summer, while the current administration pretends climate change doesn't exist. I WANT MY PUMPKIN SPICE SPOOKY SEASON SWEATER WEATHER. But also like for people to survive.

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  Whenever I go to a museum, I should get to take one thing home.

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  Never forget that the stock market, the foundation of our modern economy, is just bros that tricked people into paying them to gamble.

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  Why pay for AI when you can be cheap and barely functioning for free?

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  People who carry hope, love, and meaning inside them, in dark times, are the kind of people I want to know. Some of those people are dogs, but it still applies.

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  https://www.pcmag.com/news/fcc-ban-on-foreign-made-robots-includes-robot-vacuums Two months from now after the right people have paid him the right amount of money and compliments, Trump will announce that he's saved Robot Vacuums.

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  If even Ron DeSantis doesn't want you in his state...

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  Sometimes you just got to bite your partner, they look like a snack, and you just got to do it.

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  It's interesting how many grown ass people want a fantasy poem to be historically accurate...

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  What are your favorite breads, both sweet and savory?

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  Women are allowed to dislike men, they're allowed to ignore men, they're allowed to not even think about them at all. It is so bizarre to me when people act like men are somehow suffering because of this. You have rights, but not to our attention. What the fucking hell is this bullshit?

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  The Committee to End Committees has created a subcommittee.

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  How else will 80+ year old people find jobs if not for politics?!

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  Dark Thought: People who think they've been abducted by aliens and probed, were probably drugged and assaulted, and can't quite or don't want to remember.

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  What happens if a mosquito drinks Jesus' blood?

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  A couple questions for people who are perimenopausal/menopausal: What age did you start to notice symptoms? What were your symptoms? How long did they last or do they continue to last? Did you take or do anything to help with symptoms? Did it help? Do you feel like a different person? Honestly, feel free to drop any information you'd like. Just moving into this period of my life, and I'm curious about other people's experience.

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  I 100% get liberal women or any woman, not wanting to date Conservative men, what I have trouble understanding is why Conservative men keep trying to date liberal women, and want to change them, when there are plenty of Conservative women who want to live that Trad life (apparently, according to them). Why would you just not go find that plethora of women that want to be submissive to you?

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  Math problems be like: If there are too many waffles, how many bears will come to your picnic, solve for syrup. Math People will tell you it's both simple and obvious. We get it, you're smart!

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  It is bizarre that people still fall for, "If you raise taxes the billionaires will just leave" As if the world cannot exist without them. They only bring revenue, by literally not paying people what they're worth. Oh nooo, the ticks are leaving the dog. Please, let the door hit you on the way out.