Driving down the endless highway towards my mother Gleaming silver, the borrowed car smells of salt and honey Underneath my feet crinkle old paper. Beside me, my lover sits in the growing shadows The sun moves overhead, silent and judging As we go into the forest of steel the din and noise drowns out our conversation and all pretenses Parking, we call my mother The phone barks and shouts and sobs and buzzes It sits in my hand like a writhing snake My lover recoils and shrinks back The smell of sewage is in the air it doesn't come from the city but my heart Searching endless hours while growing shadows follow me I find a small, tiny shop filled with dried old blossoms Carefully they are wrapped up Wearily we go to the place where mothers go to die Step by step, our feet heavy, our hearts dreading I know she will shout at me; her voice like thunder her tone like fire; her heart like poison Instead she cries and sobs tears of joy Begging, she asks my forgiveness Dying, she tells me I am a beautiful woman Eternity in her eyes, she looks to the future Rejoicing in ashes; in roots; in rain As she falls asleep she tells me her secret She wishes she were a boy My mother fades into memory, and in the end I love her as in the beginning