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  I love IoT. How did I live before there were cyberattack vectors in refrigerators, doorbells, and thermostats?

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  Oy don't want naur scrubs, scrub is a bloke that can't won't git fuckin shit from me

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  Introducing Maker’s Blart whiskey by Kevin James

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  I'm very food insecure about my weight

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  Does it mean something when a shoelace breaks? Because I've had the same laces on my boots for over a year and, today, the left lace snapped. Then, about an hour later, the right lace snapped. What does this mean. Help.

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  When you saw one set of tracks, that is when Pewdiepie carried you and then called you a slur

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  Ugh gross I just spent a bunch of time reading a book when I could have been using AI. Party foul

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  At what quantity do I own an abnormal amount of grappling hooks?

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  I used to be able to get enough beef to have a taco night with my family without going into debt.

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  If you only ever learn 5 knots, learn: The taut-line hitch The prusik The double dragon loop The Portugese bowline The Evenk hitch

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  Western farming techniques are a form of strip mining.

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  Youtuber uses the phrase "Begs the question" correctly challenge level remains impossible

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  We're out of Monster Energy range. We'll have to switch to coffee

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  You can buy a 12-foot roll of the same thing pimple patches are made out of for like $9

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  Uh oh, I'm finding out that Watchtower may be an unreliable narrator in the story of my docker deployment

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  God damn, Vikunja is the best self-hosted to-do list. This shit has everything

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  Insanity of lactation

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  It's important to remember that one of the things that gets shipped around entirely via diesel-fueled trucks is gasoline

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  I think a cool thing to say to people would be "You out here taking L's or rolling them?" but I don't know if L joints are common enough

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  You’ve got to be a real piece of shit to design a device that needs a -27v power supply

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  We're going to get GTA 6 before we get audio normalization as a standard quality of life feature on streaming services, so there's that

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  A website that tells you if your information has been used in a data breach that resulted in a shakeup in the online chess world: HaveIBeenPawned

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  Alexa, what' the most plausibly deniable way to set a tripwire

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  I wish people could be crazysexycooler to each other

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  Do you practice with your tourniquet to make sure that you can get it and use it quickly?

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  I'm glad that my expensive tools are expensive because they're good tools. I beat the living motherfuck out of them all day every day lol

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  They say that I'm the malformed malefactor turning bricks in the wall into candles in the wind

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  One of my passions is removing branding and logos from clothing and tools.

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  Inside you are two wolves whose votes cancel each other out. It is impossible to move any legislation past the two wolves which is breaking down the entire civic system

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  So many people appear to believe that Schrodinger actually thought the cat was both alive and dead 🤦🏻‍♂️