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  Seems like a good time to remind people who Farage includes among his friends #nigelfarage #andrewtate

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  But the joke is on pizza guy - it's Domino's so I always chew slowly, because I'm wondering if I've accidentally taken a bite out of the box by mistake

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  When I was eight we learned about preying mantises at school in Ireland and I was like Whoa! So weird! Well I'm never going to see one of those! I would love to go back in time and tell 8yo me that I would move to New Zealand where every autumn would be a battle to save dozens of the plucky little buggers from being turned into spiky green vomit sausages in the throat of my stupid cat

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  Tomorrow's Southern Hemisphere plan: 1. Make a pile out of all the warm fluffy things in the house 2. Add cats to top of pile 3. Burrow into middle of pile with a packet of biscuits and a book

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  Finally figured out why New Zealand garlic is so disappointing, both in the shops and in the garden - it's because the only commercial variety here is printanor. Printanor hates winter temperatures, needs to go in in the spring and never bulbs up properly. Straight in the bin, imho. So that's off my grow list until I can get a heritage variety from Koanga or similar. Bugger. #gardeningNZ

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  I was BORN too old for this shit

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  Oh goddamn, RIP Nicholas Brendon. Not an easy life.

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  If you feel like your life is off kilter, like you just can't get back on the beat -do what the professionals do. Turn around and follow the drummer