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  @dantheclamman@scicomm.xyz, personally attacked by The Onion! 😳 #clamfacts https://theonion.com/biologists-announce-there-absolutely-nothing-we-can-learn-from-clams/

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  People are like “we can’t put the genie back in the bottle!” but someone got the genie in the bottle previously, so… 🤷

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  When you want to get AI-pilled but need an illustrated guide

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  Uh oh. Maybe my first FAFO moment with the bleeding edge rolling distro side of CachyOS The system did not seem to like the last upgrade

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  THERE ARE NO RULES STOP YOU CAN JUST WRITE YOUR TOOTS LIKE A TELEGRAM AND NO ONE WILL STOP YOU STOP

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  Friendly reminder: you don’t need to fly thousands of miles, pumping carbon into the atmosphere, to go to Burning Man, where you then head into the desert and risk disturbing delicate ecosystems. You can simply build an orgy dome in your own town. Think globally, act locally!

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  Mastodon/Fedi: The social network for people who have actually cleaned mouse balls 🖱️

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  The document I’m working on is 5 MB, 12,500 words. It contains 461 revisions, including 98 formatting changes. My computer is Windows 11 with i5-8500, 3 GHz, 6 cores, and 8 GB of memory. This is a fairly old, modestly spec’d office computer that should be able to handle basic web browsing and word processing. So my question to Microsoft: WHY THE FUCK DOES MY COMPUTER SLOW TO THE PACE OF A DRUGGED SLOTH WHEN I EDIT THE DOCUMENT WITH THOSE 98 FORMATTING CHANGES SHOWING???

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  Our AI escaped containment and is harassing park-goers for bread.

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  Eating peanut butter straight out of the jar will fix me

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  RE: https://famichiki.jp/@mainichi/117041017810320189 Wow this is pretty messed up

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  RE: https://famichiki.jp/@mainichi/117040427966545300 Oh sweet summer Tokyo investors

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  Won’t someone think of the second home owners?? 😭 😭

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  RE: https://famichiki.jp/@pizaman/117015434989519824 Fun fact 肛 is the kanji for anus :donki:

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  Imagine if other companies marketed their products like AI is doing Omg my robot vacuum went rogue and vacuumed all the money out of the bank’s safe!!!

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  Low-quality Japanese: Kitchen Origin is translated as 台所の元

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  RE: https://famichiki.jp/@stopthatgirl7/117012081845683702 11,000 cases of explosive diarrhea Americans: I’m not gonna eat my veggies!! A gazillion cases of Covid Americans: YOLO!

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  I love that Google Scholar gives 546 results for “Large Hardon Collider” ミ🍆💥🍆彡 Proofread your manuscripts, people!

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  Every time I see a GoFundMe, I makes me incredibly mad that we Americans would rather normalize making sick people beg for money on the internet than have big bad, scary “socialized medicine”

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  I’m sorry to report that after a brief reprieve, the sun is again a deadly laser

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  Every sign tells a story #signs

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  Ok hear me out: air-conditioned kotatsu 💡

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  Making a porn knock off of The Odyssey. I’m thinking of calling it The Odyussy

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  Is it okay to go see The Odyssey if I haven't seen The Iliad yet??

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  I know you shouldn’t judge other people’s parenting, but….

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  Apes find a rectangular rock, then humans find the rectangular rock, then the computer breaks, and then a human finds the rectangular rock again

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  Babe, wake up. New monkey just dropped https://news.yale.edu/2026/07/15/meet-likweli-new-monkey-species-discovered-congo-basin

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  American’s puritanical streak is showing!

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  Apparently conspiracy theories are swirling around Lindsey Graham's death. There's lots of unfounded speculation that either the Russians or the Iranians spent almost 70 years slipping him bacon grease, sweet tea, and macaroni & cheese that counted as a vegetable.